Song For Someone
by 221bdeductions
Summary: Alby really was going to leave. He would've spent hours trying to forget anything about his hospital visit. He would've wondered about the suicidal british boy with eyes filled with emotion as the ocean was with fish. He might've thought about him until the memory faded. Maybe he would've heard about that same boy's death, but he would've moved on. That's not what happened.
1. I've Got Scars From Where I've Been

City lights cut through the darkness like man made suns. Wind bit and shoved, forcing everyone still outside to long for the comfort of their home.

Everyone but one that is. This person didn't have a home and the cold seemed fitting for the sober occasion.

He stood where no one would think to look, if anyone was looking that is. He highly doubted it.

The building was old and vacant. It had been that way for years, and the boy felt a connection to the brick building that was slowly falling apart. No one else cared about it. No one stepped into fix it as they watched it silently crumble right in front of them.

The boy had tried to brighten it up and in some aspects he had succeeded. The walls on the inside were now a peaceful blue color and candles hung from home made chandeliers. (Bird houses that he had saved up for and then cut off the small roofs.)

They were the product of his hard work and way too many hours of free time.

Despite all of this, the building still slowly fell apart along with him.

The boy who stood on the ledge of that building was a smart kid, just like his name sake.

He had known that there was a great possibility his life could get better. He had known this when he'd cut into soft flesh and watched the red spill over his wrist like an abstract paining. He had known that one second could change everything in his life and that maybe one day he would feel...okay.

He had known this when he climbed out the window and up the fire escape. Up,up,up, until he could see the whole city stretched out bellow him.

He had done this so many times before. It had been a part of his daily routine, but this time was different. This time he knew he could do it.

He felt the wind nudging him backwards as it caused messy strands of blond to shake.

He laughed, a broken quiet sound. The wind was the only one who tried to stop him. No one begged him to stay but the forces of a world he was so sick of._ "Oh the shucking irony.",_ he thought.

The boy had climbed because he'd known one thing for certain. If someone or something could come along and fix his life, if they didn't get there soon there would be nothing left of him to save. He'd rather die now then live one more day as a broken shell. He was done.

Now, he stood still on the small ledge and looked anywhere but the pavement below him. He didn't want to see his final destination and it was lucky he didn't. He noticed as the light from the small bakery under him was turned off and darkness covered him like a jacket that had been left outside.

It was a new place and somepart of the boy wished he gone as the scent of fresher baked bread hit him. Maybe he would... No! He would not back down again!

He took a deep breath and held his arms out like wings. "I tried.", he swore to the heavens.

All it took was a small step foreword. Barely a step at all, more like a shuffle, and gravity yanked him away from the safety of the roof.

He was a boy that had touched so many strangers just by his natural kindness. He was the boy that made the greenies at the orphanage feel welcome. He was the boy that played with the loners and helped the caretakers with a small smile. He was the one that amazed his teachers with his intelligence, the one that would run and escape for hours, sometimes even smile for real. Bright and rare.

He yelped in surprise when he was jerked to a stop and fell the air rush past him in the opposite direction as it should be. He hadn't remembered there being a trampoline being put there.

A ripping sound filled his ears. On instinct, his hands clutched at anything they could find, desperately digging into the hard fabric.

For a second everything stood still and all he could hear was his harsh breaths and the pounding of his heart as it tried to flee from his chest. There was another ripping sound and he wondered what had happened, but then he was falling again.

The boy that had no one hit the ground with a sickening crunch and a scream of agony before the world faded away mercifully and sheltered him in a quiet place.

Newt's arms were stretched out like wings as a puddle of red expanded around him. He looked like a bird that had failed to fly, broken and small.

But even though he wanted to give up, his body hadn't gotten the memo.

Newt was still breathing when a scream echoed through the ally and when it's owner dialed 911.

* * *

><p>Alby walked down the long hallways and saw the door to escape from his own personal hell. It was about time.<p>

School had been especially hard today and Alby was starting to thing that Gally and Ben actually couldn't shut up, and as much as some of the things Gally whispered in class put a fire in his belly, Alby forced himself not to react.

Adults called it anger issues. He called it being surrounded by a**holes. No matter what anyone thought, the fact was that if he so much as shoved someone he'd be expelled.

Alby was just about to yank open the door when he heard as voice like a snarl. "Where do you think you're going?"

"Nowhere that concerns you."

Alby turned to face Ben and Gally with an eye roll and a sigh to top it off. They were both watching him and leaning again different sides of the hallway. They would have looked like an album cover if not for their glaring eyes and smirking lips.

Alby had known it would've been smart just to leave and walk away. He had known it when his hands clenched into fist as pent up frustration searched for a physical outlet.

He had known when he took a step forward- It was that one step that would lead the way to the boy currently limp and strapped to a gurney as his arrival at the hospital was announced with the screams of a siren and flashing lights.- and he had definitely known he should've left when he woke up staring at a white ceiling that wasn't his own.

"Hey look. Fight clubs finally up."

Alby groggily turned his head to stare at the two boys in blue hospital attire and name tags that he would've read if the word didn't blur like they were underwater.

The one that had spoken was asian with dark hair and an sharp intelligent gaze of dark eyes to match his hair.

He smirked at his own remark as he nudged the other boy who rolled his coco powder colored eyes.

Just like the other hospital worker's they screamed of intelligence. Alby wondered if they were doctors in training.

Instead of asking, he just stared from his bed and rubbed his forehead. He just wanted to sleep and he could already feel the waking world weighing on his exhausted mind.

The boy with light brown eyes and and short dark brown hair turned his attention to the patient. "Hi. I'm Thomas and this is Minho. You are in Glade Hospital. How are you feeling?"

"Fine.", Alby lied. "When can I leave?" Hospitals gave him the creeps and he could deal with his head pounded just as well from his own couch.

Minho seemed to think differently though because he scoffed. "Not for at least a week. That's what happens when you fight two vs one and end up falling down stairs."

"A week?!", Alby exclaimed and sat up in outrage and full of protest. He gasped as pain took over his anger and felt strong arms gently lower him back to the bed.

"At least.", Thomas said with a sympathetic glance. Alby glared but gave up and leaned back against the soft, welcoming pillows. He could find a way out once his brain stopped pounding against his scull.

Minho walked over with a cup of water and a pill. Alby glared at the pill but took it anyway. Anything to make the headache fade. The water felt amazing as it ran down his dry throat and caused him to sigh lightly once he'd drunken it all. "How long was I out?"

"About a day.", Minho answered casually as he took the cup back and placed it on the dresser.

Thomas grabbed the clipboard from the end of the bed and started to flip through it. "Twenty-two hours.", he answered more specifically.

He began to list injuries and Alby grimly listened and nodded thinking about how stupid he'd been for staying to fight, but at the same time thinking about how he was going to kill Gally for this one.

Half way through the list Thomas' wrist watch beeped causing Alby to wince and his hand to fly to his abused head.

Thomas switched it off quickly and apologized. Alby was immediately curious when he caught a glimpse of sadness in the brown orbs that hadn't been there before.

Then, Minho cleared his throat and offered, "I can go check on the jumper this time Thomas. You just keep listing why the fight was a bad idea to this poor shank."

Thomas got up and shook his head. He gave Minho a smile. "No I'll go. I don't want the poor kid to wake up to your face."

Minho smirked confidently and sat down leaning the chair back on two legs. "The kid would be lucky to wake up to this." He made a circled around his own face with his hand.

Alby snorted earning him a laugh from Thomas and a mock glare from Minho. Once Thomas had left Ably asked, "Jumper?"

Minho shrugged nonchalantly but Alby could see he was troubled by the slight scrunching between his eyebrows and the way the sharpness in his eyes faded away a little bit as if it was focussed on something inside his own head. Alby would bet good money that the gears in that head were turning.

"Yeah. A sixteen year old jumped off the roof of a building last night. He would've died but he apparently didn't look at the ground closely because he fell into a banister. He's still not in great shape. The fall from the banister was still pretty darn high. His name's Newt."

Alby frowned. He now had a pretty good idea what Minho was thinking about. Why would anyone want to take their own life? What could be so bad? "Is he going to make it?", he asked out loud.

Minho's hands clenched into fist and he got up. "It doesn't look good. Newt hit his head and he's lost a lot of blood. If he doesn't wake up soon his chances will be almost nonexistent."

He walked over to the door and turned back with a frustrated sigh. "But we can never give up on a patient. We're not giving up on him."

Alby nodded and then he was left alone in the white hospital room with nothing but his thoughts.

* * *

><p>Another day went by and Newt hadn't stirred. Alby watched the hope seem to slowly drip out of Thomas and Minho for their patient.<p>

Alby had found out that Thomas and Minho were both studying to be doctors but for the moment they had taken jobs as nurses to pay for their shared apartment.

Alby's injuries weren't all that bad, despite how long the list had been. Most were so minor he barley noticed. The worst being a broken rib and a fractured ankle, and he was already starting physical therapy and discovering just how much he despised crutches.

When it happened, he'd been making his way down the hallway at a snails pace while Minho talked about the hospital and the staff. Occasionally he would say something encouraging to spur the patient on.

Alby was breathing heavily from the strain put on his body and was starting to actually consider laying on the floor. The only thing stopping him was his stubborn pride.

When he finally got a break he leaned against the wall and took gulps from the cold water bottle Minho handed to him. He had just taken his third gulp when Thomas peaked out of one of the rooms with a strange mix of excitement and nervousness on his face. "Newt's awake! Get a doctor!"

Minho took off like a race car, faster than Alby had ever seen anyone run. Thomas had already disappeared inside the room again and Alby reluctantly pushed off of the wall to limp to the room.

He'd expected the kid to look dead. Blank depressed eyes filled with hopelessness and limp on the bed as if he wanted to lay there until the end of his days. He was shocked at how wrong his mental image had been.

Newt was looking around the room so fast that Alby was afraid he'd snap his own neck with the quick movement. He was skinny but not a weak twig like Alby had pictured in his mind and his eyes-

Alby could've spent all day looking into those eyes and when he latter looked back on their first meeting he'd been sure he must've stared at Newt for an uncomfortably long time. But he couldn't blame himself.

Newt had bright, honest blue eyes like the skies in tropical islands that Alby had only seen from his small TV screen, but that wasn't what made them really special. Tons of blue had pretty blue eyes after all. What set this pair apart was how they were filled to the brim with more emotions than Alby could identify.

Confusion was big one, followed by curiosity, fear, pain, nervousness and the tiniest bit of hope with hidden sadness in the background. They were like two sparks that could turn into explosions any minute.

Finally, Newt's overwhelmed brain seemed to realize where he was and that he had failed to take his own life.

Just like that, all those emotions in those bright eyes were swept away by defeat and the patient slumped in the hospital bed looking for the first time exactly how Alby had imagined him.

**It is so hard to come up with ****similes for brown eyes! Anyway, I hope you liked the first chapter. Please let me know what you thought and how I can do better. :)**


	2. Eyes That Can See Right Through Me

**Thanks to my best friend, MrsAdamLambert for editing this chapter!**

Alby stared at the boy whose pale skin blended in with the covers. He was staring up like he could see through the ceiling. After a few minutes of this passed, in which the patient seemed unaware or uncaring of the uncomfortable silence in the small room (Alby reckoned it was the latter). The two boys who were being suffocated by the silence were rescued by the sounds of frantic footsteps in the hall.

Minho burst through the door and moved to stand next to Thomas as the doctor walked in behind him. The man was average height with red hair and a face that was flushed light red due to his frantic dash. Trying to keep up with Minho was like trying to chase a cheetah. The only difference was a cheetah wouldn't yell at him to hurry up.

When Newton didn't even glance at them, Minho whispered to Thomas. "What's he looking at?" Thomas shrugged and deadpanned, "The ceiling." Minho elbowed his friend. "No shit Sherlock." he responded. He was just a bit too loud and all three boys standing near the wall received a glare from the doctor.

The reproaching gaze caused Thomas and and Minho to look down like two guilty children, but Alby stared emotionlessly at the doctor. He allowed his gaze to fall from the man's face to his name tag.

Doctor Clint tilted his head at Alby, probably wondering who he was, but then sighed and just shook his head. Alby felt a bit sorry for the guy. He seemed like someone who had a lot to deal with, proven by the dark circles under his eyes.

However, he didn't feel quite bad enough to leave. He was curious about the boy who would've looked like a corpse if not for the rising and falling of his breathing which was moving the covers slightly in ripples of white.

Clint hesitantly walked over to Newton's bedside and said, "Newton I need you to look at me.", in the calm way all doctors seemed to know how to use. "Maybe, it's part of their training," Alby thought as he stared at Newton and willed the boy to look away from the ceiling and say something.

It was downright creepy to see someone like this. The boy looked as if all the energy and will had been sucked out of him, which Alby had never seen anyone living without.

There was a hope that all humans seemed to share. The high schooler wanted an all A report card, to be prom queen, or the star athlete. The collage student wanted to be get a degree and the workers wanted to be rich.

It was the hope that things could get better. People were swept along with the fuel of their hopes.

Even Alby was working towards a goal. He wanted to graduate from his shitty community collage and move far away. Everyone believed they could do whatever their main goal was, even if they couldn't because they needed to to keep going.

Newton had no such hope anymore, which was a foreign sight to see on anyone much less someone so young.

Alby supposed the reason he'd never seen anyone without hope was because they all offed themselves like Newton had tried to do.

* * *

><p>Newt could feel the mocking beat of his heart. He was alive. He was alive and in a bloody hospital!<p>

He'd been gone. Stolen away by gravity and now he was here again, dragged back to the land of the living. He wasn't ready to face that world again. He wasn't ready to deal with the fact that this wasn't shucking over for him. He wasn't ready for the looks of pity and concern he just knew he would receive.

All he wanted was to lay there and stare into nothing without the annoying voice nudging him closer to reality. The longer he stared at the white ceiling the more he could block out the world. It was almost too easy to loose himself in the fog clouding his mind in a barrier.

Thoughts and questions pushed through the fog. Newt began to wonder how he was alive at all. He noticed traces of a numbed pain, like an iced burn. He wanted to know why his leg felt like that. He wanted to know who the gazes he could feel on him belonged too.

At the same time he couldn't bring himself to really care. He felt like he was seeing the world from under water, muffled sounds, blurry sights, and slow movements. It was almost as if-

"You bloody drugged me!" he accused the doctor and turned his head to stare the man down. The doctor at least had the good graces to look mildly apologetic, but the main expression he showed was relief and Newt wondered how long he'd been ignoring the world.

"Welcome back Newton," the doctor said with a tiny smile. "The drugs were necessary for the pa-"

"Newt.", Newt corrected as his hazy thoughts finally organized.

"Excuse me?"

"Call me Newt."

"...Okay."

Doctor Clint began to speak again but he no longer had the attention of his patient. Newt had noticed the other people in the room and shifted to glance around the doctor.

Newt stared at the other young men in the room, almost as if daring them to speak.

Newt offered them an awkward little wave to try and break the lingering silence. He was starting to feel uncomfortable, and he wished that the other people in the room would stop staring at him like he'd come back from the dead. "I don't bite ya know."

They looked a bit older than him. The eldest, a muscular Asian who was still staring at him, looked to be in his early twenties.

No one moved except from the brunet standing in the middle who indulged him with a small wave back. _"Say something and stop staring ya shanks!",_ Newt mentally pleaded and he looked away. His head snapped back up however when the Asain boy began to speak. "It's about time you woke up sleeping beauty. I'm Minho. That's Thomas and Alby. Welcome to the Glade."

* * *

><p>Days went by with Alby in almost constant boredom. There nothing to do in the hospital except to rest and wonder about Newt. He had only caught glances of the British boy as he passed the room. Number 5, the third door on the right on the first floor, but not that he had memorized it or anything. Why would he do that?<p>

The older boy always told himself that it was silly top peak into the room like a child, but he continued to pander himself with small stolen glances.

He didn't get why he even bothered anymore. Newt wasn't doing anything crazy. Most of the time, the patient was reading in bed with a far away look in those blue eyes. Though Alby tried, he couldn't close his own brown eyes without seeing those ocean eyes and he didn't understand why.

But he had other things to focus on.

Alby's parents had called earlier to say that they would pick him up once they got back from their vacation, and that he would be getting an earful about fighting again.

The disappointment seemed to flow through the phone. No, "How are you?" or "My poor baby!"

Alby hadn't expected anything more. He was the unwanted one in the family after all. They had already made that clear by the way the ignored him at all cost. He shook it off and went back to resting, being driven into insanity by boredom, and trying to think about anything except collage and the boy in room five.

He'd found that the new highlight of his day was talking to Minho and Thomas. it was better than staring at the walls all day, and the other boys weren't all that bad.

Sometimes, they would tell him about Newt. Minho told him that Newt had gotten all quiet ever since he'd found out about his leg injury. Apparently, the boy loved to run and the world had decided it would be fun to take something more away from the already depressed patient.

Thomas told him that Newt would be starting physical therapy soon. He was more optimistic as he talked about getting the patient back on his feet.

Alby learned that Minho told it as it is - in his own special sarcastic way of course -, and Thomas was the kind of person who firmly believed that a situation would work out and shoved any doubt out of his mind. They both would never give up on a patient and Alby found himself rooting for "Team Save Newt", as he'd begun to think of them.

It seemed like the other patient was stuck in the same boat as Alby. The constant routine of rest and more rest, until they died of boredom.

At least the rooms had TVs. He had been in the middle of a Lord of the Rings marathon when he heard a sharp intake of breath outside his door. He paused the movie and walked over to the door.

Alby felt like a child eavesdropping on the adults, as he pressed his ear the the wooden door. He heard nothing for a few minutes but then there were two almost in sync taps and an muffled gasp. "Shuck! How does anyone walk with these?" a familiar voice demanded. Easily identified by the British accent.

But Newt's voice didn't hold any real strength and he could hear the patient's gasps for air. "I have no idea but you'll get better at it. You're body is under a lot of strain right now." said another who Alby identified as Thomas.

He debated going back to bed, but stopped himself when he heard a sharp cry pierce through the door.

Alby barely registered having moved at all before he was out of the room with his heart in his throat as if it too wanted to see want was happening.

Newt was leaning against Thomas, with one hand gripping tight to the blue uniform shirt and the other clutching one of the crutches close like a teddy bear. The gaze that Alby had thought about unwillingly for days was blocked by eyelids shut tight. One of the crutches was left forgotten on the floor as Newt cursed with words Alby had never heard before.

"Shuck! Stupid piece of klunk leg!" The words were forced out in between gasps and hisses as Alby watched Newt's struggle to get his bad leg, now in a brace, to straighten.

Thomas quickly pulled Newt up taking the weight off his injured and and letting the other boy lean heavily on him. "I know. It shucks.", he agreed wholeheartedly with his patient.

As Alby stood there, he'd never felt so helpless. He wanted to do something, anything to help but he froze and selfishly wished that Newt would stop making those muffled cries that cut Alby deeper than any physical blade ever could.

Alby knew he was a tough guy. He'd dealt with a lot of crap in his young life but he'd took it in stride. Seeing this boy in so much pain and unable to help made him want to sob, though strangely Newt hadn't shed a single tear.

Newt was keeping his tears in by a stubbornness which Alby was familiar with. It was the same stubbornness both boys had carried around their whole lives. It kept tears at bay and mouths from screaming for help.

Mercifully, Newt's breathing evened out and after a few moments his eyes fluttered open to stare right at Alby, who stared back feeling like an idiot for just standing there but frozen. He was captured in a gaze the color of ice that somehow was making him feel warm.

Thomas paid Alby no attention and the other boy couldn't blame him. Thomas still had Newt clutching to him and quivering with the effort of just standing up.

"Ready?" he asked after Newt had shifted away from him. Alby was at a loss to what Thomas was asking until Newt nodded and the nurse said, "Just lean on me and once we get back you can rest for the whole rest of the day."

That's when Alby realized that Thomas was asking Newt to try and walk. Suddenly, the distance to room five was miles away and Newt didn't have any hope of crossing them.

Newt looked down the hallway and seemed to have a similar thought, because Alby saw a hint of desperation in the other boy's watery eyes. But, before Alby knew it, Newt was standing with impossible strength and determination.

Then he raised a pale hand, while still clutching the crutch to wipe his eyes. That motion snapped the invisible bond that had held Alby in place.

It became obvious to Alby that he would not let Newt walk all the way to his room when he was shaking just standing up. He didn't hesitate to step closer, pull Newt into his arms, and then scoop the skinny boy off the ground. The other crutch hit the ground.

Newt gasped and Alby froze thinking he had hurt the boy, but when he looked at Newt's face all he saw was surprise and a fair amount of confusion.

The smaller patient looked even paler in contrast to the other boy's dark arms. He was taunt like a bow string and the palms of both of his hands were pressed against Alby's chest like he was thinking about pushing away.

"I'm taking you back to your room." Alby stated as if it wasn't obvious. Newt sighed and the string was cut. Alby could feel the tension leave the younger boy as it sank in that he wouldn't have to walk anymore.

Newt smiled weakly in gratitude and the other patient beamed back. The smile was small and it slipped after a few seconds, but Alby felt like making Newt smile was one of his greatest achievements.

Newt yawned and wrapped and arm around Alby's shoulders. His eyes fell closed and he rested his head against his escort's chest.

"Good that."

Hello! I know you all have "notes from the author" so I decided to have notes from the editor! Yes it's moi, the fabulous MrsAdamLambert and I am editing this chapter (as you can probably tell from the lack of run-on sentences). Now, you all better favorite, follow, or review this story. Also, if enough of you review that you want more of me then... We might be able to convince 221bdeductions (?) to let me leave a note on each chapter. That's right, you could all have a note from me, Ms. Linguistically Inclined each chapter! (Hopefully the author will not cut this part out). Also if you want, I can do movie reviews or reviews of Taylor Swifts new album 1989! Or I can do recommendation of the chapter! This chapter's is Lizzie Bennet Diaries! It's a comedic YouTube remake of pride and prejudice by Hank Green and Bernie Su.

Yours truly,

~MrsAdamLambert

~AnnaL


	3. You're Not Afraid

Alby cradled Newt protectively in his arms. The walk to room five suddenly seemed devastatingly short.

Then Minho walked over with a huge smirk on his face and Alby picked up his pace because he could already hear the teasing. Minho laughed and jogged to catch up to Alby as if reading his mind. He smiled at Newt and said, "Looks like sleeping beauty found a prince."

Newt didn't even open his eyes. He muttered, "Shuck off." and kicked out his surprisingly well aimed uninjured leg causing Minho to back up. "Whoa there Mulan!" the nurse exclaimed as he backed up quickly. Newt chuckled and Alby could feel the other patient's breath ghost across his shoulder. It was warm yet for some reason he still shivered.

Thomas and Minho both looked surprised and then downright ecstatic. They wore matching grins of achievement as if they'd just won a carnival game. Minho held out a hand for Thomas to high five and the other nurse lightly slapped it away, not wanting to alert Newt of their celebratory moment.

Alby tilted his head at them for a moment before it hit him. Newt chuckling or even smiling wouldn't be a normal occurrence. Of course not. The boy had just jumped off a roof not even a week ago. It was just so easy to forget at the moment. Newt looked so young curled up in his arms. He had a content little smile on his face and Alby never wanted to see the boy without it.

He tightened his hold around the blond in his arms protectively causing him to squirm. He quickly loosened his grip and shifted to let the other patient's head fall back on his shoulder. Newt's eyes remained closed and he shifted closer to get comfortable again. Alby sighed.

Once they reached the room, Alby smiled fondly at the messy pile of books that would surely topple over soon. A cup of tea was balanced precariously on the bedside table along with them. Though Alby barely knew the young man in his arms, it just seemed so...so Newt. Thomas pulled back the covers and Alby nodded his gratitude as he set the younger patient down on the hospital bed. It was a slow process because Alby wanted desperately not to cause Newt any pain or rouse him.

He slowly lowered the arm holding up the other patient's legs and when Newt didn't so much as flinch he sighed in relief. Alby set Newt down completely and then started to pull up the blankets to tuck- Wait what?

The older patient froze with the blankets clutched in his hands. He'd learned that this kind of behavior only got him stepped on. He'd grown up poor and in a tough town where kindness was weakness that would be exploited at the first opportunity. He was already too much of a disappointment as it was.

He wasn't the gently tuck in type. No way! He'd been repeatedly told by people that he needed to be less harsh, more gentle, but life had told him different things. Alby was tough as nails. He had built up so many walls Miley Cyrus on a wrecking ball would have trouble breaking them down. Yet here he was. He was in a hospital tucking in an adorable suicidal jumper.

Newt still wanted to die. All Alby would get himself by trying to help would be wasted time an unnecessary heartache once Newt got his hands on a sharp object or near a high ledge.

He'd been down this road before. He couldn't help his friend who died from an OD. He couldn't help the alcoholics that he'd grown up seeing passed out on sidewalks at night. He'd tried and all it had gotten him was ending up unable to prove he was worth being pulled to higher ground with his family when they got a lucky break.

All it had taken was one small smile and a chuckle and those walls had crumbled as if Newt had bombed them. Alby's worst fears had become causing Newt any discomfort or losing the suicidal patient! What the hell was wrong with him?

His worst fear should be that he might loose his chance at graduating collage or that he'd lost a fight to Gally and Ben. This was bad. This was very-

"Alby?", a voice brought him out of his musings only to find Newt staring at him with concern filling his eyes. Concern for the other patient. Concern for the patient that was already able to leave, the patient that was healed enough to carry another. Newt was concerned about Alby who was fine. _"What's wrong with this_ kid?", Alby thought in bewilderment.

A pale hand covered Alby's dark skin which was still clutching the blankets and drawing the other boy out of his thoughts.

Alby looked down at the hand covering his. The hospital attire was slightly baggy on the other patient and slid down to his elbow when Newt reached at an upward angle to grab the other patient's hand.

That's when Alby saw them. Rows lines marred Newt's wrist. The air was suddenly too thin and Alby felt sick. The room seemed to shrink making him feel trapped. trapped in that horrible moment of realization that this was real. Newt had done this to himself.

That sweet little smile really was rare. The boy in front of him was depressed and had jumped off a building. The boy in front of him might die any day be his own hand. It was like being a kid again, and then having the golden tinted spectacles thrown to the ground and stepped on so he could only see the real world. He was unable to look away from the lines marring Newt's wrist.

People with the kind of compassion Newt was showing should be protected. They should be loved and cherished because they were so damn rare! They shouldn't be lying in hospital beds!

Alby wanted to scrap this whole sick world! Newt with the strength to stand on a mangled leg and those selfless, compassionate eyes that were making Alby want to cry didn't deserve to have lived a life so horrible that he couldn't handle it. It was so wrong!

Alby had never felt injustice so strong in his life. He couldn't take it. He felt like he was going to puke but he had to stay strong for Newt, just until the other patient fell asleep. Then, Alby would be able to puke his guts out as the horror of their world sank in and infected him.

"Look at me you shank." Newt demanded and Alby felt the pale fingers tighten around his hand. Alby tore his gaze away from Newt's abused wrist and to the boy's face. "I'm fine.", Alby lied firmly for the sake of the other patient. Newt frowned and Alby was hit by a tidal wave of guilt. He couldn't do one thing right could he? He needed to leave the too small room with the kindest person in the world with the most tragic story.

So he did. Alby pulled the blankets up to Newt's chin and ordered, "Get some rest," and tried to appear like he wasn't going to go be sick as he speed walked out of the room.

Cold water splashed across his face. It was refreshing, but it didn't wash away the memorizes of the day or really help. Alby was feverishly working to convince himself he didn't care, that he should be running away from being dragged down again with a lost cause.

No. Newt couldn't be a lost cause. It was so wrong. Every part of Alby screamed at him to do something. He wanted to. He really did but how could he be any help at all?

Alby wasn't gentle. He had crappy bedside manner. He wasn't a "talk it out" kind of person. He wasn't what Newt needed.

Concerned blue eyes flashed in Alby's memory, haunting him. Those eyes were too kind, too open to just be gone. Alby stared at his now wet hands. He saw dark smooth skin and he ran one hand over his wrist. His brain tormented him with images of raised pale skin. "Damn it." he gasped and forced himself to straighten away from the cool water.

"Yeah I know."

Alby jumped and turned to stare at the nurse leaning against the wall behind him. Minho looked so calm as if seeing patients like Newt was a normal occurrence. Alby really hoped not.

"What are you doing here?" he demanded as he wiped his face and stared at the nurse. Alby realized how lost in thought he must've been to not notice Minho watching him. It made him uneasy that he had been watched at all.

"Just wanted to check on our grumpiest patient. I was worried you were going to drown for a minute there."

Alby crossed his arms and didn't answer. Minho had something he wanted to say. Alby could see the purpose in his dark gaze.

"You can't do that." Minho stated calmly. "Do what?" Alby asked defensively.

Minho didn't miss a beat. "Newt needs to worry about himself right now. You can't break down at the sight of scars. So either you get your shuck head together or you leave. You want to help. That's shucking fantastic. You know it's hard not to care, so you know that is what you gotta do. Newt will hide his pain if he thinks it's hurting someone else. If you can't keep it together you leave. Simple."

Alby had never seen Minho without a confident smirk and sarcastic remarks flowing from his lips, but at this moment the young man was completely serious.

Alby nodded and said, "I know. I'm leaving." He walked past the nurse nurse to the door but he just had to ask, "Shucking?"

The smirk made its triumphant return. "Newt's orphanage was strict about swears. It's a substitute for the f bomb. Newt's speech is catching. I think Thomas might be turning British. Yesterday he said he needed some bloody shucking coffee."

Minho chuckled lightly and then walked with Alby out the door before turning down the hallway to room five.

Alby watched the other boy leaved and stayed rooted in place despite something screaming at him to follow.

C'est moi! (It's me) The editor! So I don't know how many of you caught my Miley Cyrus reference I added in there. (I added it in while beta-ing) Speaking of, yours truly is now the official beta! I was only supposed to do that one chapter, then it escalated to more! I'm very disappointed in all you you for not asking for me in the comments.

MrsAdamLambert's suggestion of the chapter: The Autobiography of Jane Eyre! Last week I recommended the Lizzie Bennet Diaries, which is somewhat similar. If you can't tell, this YouTube series is based off the classic novel Jane Eyre.

MrsAdamLambert's song of the chapter: Good Girls Go Bad by Cobra Starship. I know I know, it sounds really inappropriate but it's not (sort of)! It's featuring Leighton Meester (Blaire Waldorf from Gossip Girl). It's a fun song that's great to dance to.

Remember: "Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars" ~MLK Jr.

Love y'all!

Here's the next chapter! It's 9:48 so you're welcome.

~AnnaL


	4. I Was Told I Would Feel Nothing

_**N**_

Depression is like a weight, making things so much harder. Newt could feel it pinning him down as he laid on the bed. He wanted to read the stacks of books that were brought to him by Tommy. He wanted to find Alby, thank him for the lift, and make sure the other patient was okay. However, to do either of those things he would have to sit up.

Newt opened his eyes and found himself staring at a pile of books. He sighed. He just didn't think he had the energy to drag the weight around today.

He closed his eyes again and enjoyed the silence. Then his peace was shattered by the sound of tiny footsteps and giggles. Newt felt a stab of pain worse than the feeling of his leg shattering against the pavement. He pushed his hands over his ears as if he could block out the imaginary sounds dragged up from his memories to torture him.

It actually seemed to help a bit and Newt relaxed and tried to burry the memories that had resurfaced, but then it hit him. His eyes snapped open. If the sound could be blocked out like that it was real. Newt sat up and stared out the open door and into the hallway. "No Teresa! I can't just have a tea party with my bears!", came the high pitched voice of a child. "I'll play with you!", an older voice said. "No! You're always busy!", the child protested.

Newt heard the footsteps approaching and watched as a little girl sprinted halfway past the door-a flash of green and pink- and then skidded to stop. She was clutching a teddy bear and couldn't have been more than six years old. The green scarf around her bald head had started to come undone and it dangled down her shoulder. Newt felt his throat tighten but forced out. "Hello." when she waved.

The girls eyes widened in joy as if it was Christmas. "You have the tea party voice!", she squealed in delight. Newt felt his lips curl up into a small smile without him having to force them. It felt nice. A young woman raced into view and scoped up the child causing the little girl to shriek in surprise and then giggle. "Teresa! He has a tea party voice! Can he play with us! Pleeeeeaaasssseee!"

Newt wasn't sure if he wanted to laugh or cry. he remembered so clearly another small voice. "Newt pleeeaaassee?" Remembering the voice's owner only forced his brain to scream at him that she was gone, gone, gone.

Teresa, a twenty something year old nurse with black hair and blue eyes, looked at Newt with confusion probably wondering what a tea party voice sounded like. Newt offered her a small smile with humor dancing in his eyes. "Hello." He repeated and watched as Teresa smiled with understanding at hearing his accent.

"See!" the girl said and she looked excited about proving to Teresa that he indeed had a 'tea party voice.' Teresa laughed lightly and said, "I see that, but other patients need to rest. They're trying to get better just like you." The sadness that over took the girls expression had his older brother instincts arising from were they'd been buried. "Nah. I've been resting all bloody day."

Maybe depression felt like a weight, but Newt could always find a way to carry if to make someone else smile, even if it was just for a short while.

That's had he found himself rediscovering his braiding skills in the children's section of the hospital surrounded by stuffed animals and drinking imaginary tea.

_**A**_

Alby really was going to leave. He walked down the long white halls in a fast pace.

He would've spent hours trying to forget anything about his hospital visit. His parents would've flown home the next day and killed him just to revive him and throw him back into collage. He would've wondered about the suicidal british kid with eyes like the sky and as filled with emotion as the ocean was with fish. Thoughts of him would sneak into his mind, maybe at night, maybe in class, maybe several times a day. Then, he would've forgotten. Or.. maybe he would've heard about a death that would hit him like a car but he would've recovered. In that scenario it would never have been his business.

That's not how it happened.

Alby was walking down the halls to the exit with Thomas and Minho when he heard them. First, the sound of a child's high pitched laughter. "You need to brush the hair first!" "I knew I was forgetting something. Thank you princess Clara.", a british accented voice answered and Alby was following the sound waves before his mind caught up with his actions.

He saw Newt playing with a little girl. Of course he'd be good with kids. Was there anything not perfect about this boy? His brain unhelpfully told him, "well, there is the depression." Alby banished that thought and continued to watch.

_**N**_

Newt found himself surrounded by teddy bears and sitting next to Clara. He had a doll and his hand and was braiding the long strands of blonde hair. The little girl stood up and peered over Newt's shoulder at the doll. "Where'd you learn to do that!? What is that?"

Newt's hands stilled for a moment and when they reassumed their movement it was almost hesitant. "It's a french braid. My sister taught me," he answered calmly while blinking back the moisture blurring his vision.

"Is she here too? My sister visits me a lot. She's really old and has a big red car and we go for ice cream!" Newt chuckled weakly. "No she's not with me anymore."

"Oh! She's in heaven!" Newt looked up in surprise to stare at the young girl. "My friend Danny is there too. I miss him. You probably miss her too but mommy says that heaven is really fun so they're happy. I wonder if there's a pool there..." She trailed off thoughtfully.

Newt had learned not to underestimate the perceptiveness of children while in the orphanage but that didn't stop his surprise at her words. "Um. Yes I bet they have a great swimming pool. The best swimming pool in existence." he said once he had recovered his voice. He looked away quickly because he refused to break down in front of this sweet little girl. "_Get you klunk together Newt!_" he commanded himself.

Clara nodded and sat back down. "Are you almost done?" Newt nodded and handed her back the doll. "All done."

Clara took back the doll and smiled. "Thank you." She rushed forward to hug him and Newt quickly put his hands out. "Woah! Careful!" The girl tilted her head and Newt explained, "My legs broken." She nodded and carefuly walked around his leg to hug him. "Wha' happened to it?"

"I tried to fly."

"You fell?"

"I wasn't ready to fly yet. Maybe soon."

She shook her head. "To fly you gotta be an angel and then I'll miss you like Danny."

Newt sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I have people I miss to. I shucking miss her so much." He winced at his slip of tongue. Shucking wasn't a real swear but it still didn't feel right to say in front of a child. He looked over at Clara. She was frowning. "But I'll try to stick around.", he promised.

"Me too!" Clare squealed happily. "And later we can meet at the swimming pool!"

"Only after a good long while." Newt said seriously and remembered something his sister always did.

"Pinky promise?"

"Pink promise!"

**_A_**

"You've got to be shucking kidding me!", Minho whispered. Alby jumped slightly at the reminder he wasn't alone. He looked at the other young man in confusion. "Newt hasn't said a word to the therapist, me, or Thomas! All it took was one little girl and his whole life story comes out!"

Thomas shrugged with a thoughtful expression. "It doesn't sound like something anyone would want to talk about. He lost his sister."

Alby went back to watching Newt. The other patient was pretending to drink out of a plastic tea cup. Alby wasn't the type to aw over kittens or anything but he had to admit it was an adorable sight. As he tore his gaze away and glanced down at the backpack with his tuff in it, he realized there was no way he'd leave Newt here.

Well I'm too tired to say much this week.

Song of the week: All You Had to Do Was Stay by Taylor Swift

Book of the week: Magnolia

Nighty!

~MrsAdamLambert

~AnnaL


	5. I Don't Know How These Cuts Heal

In the calm before the storm, Minho leaned against the wall and calmly listened to Alby's idea. After it was explained Minho nodded as if thinking and then suddenly exclaimed, "Are you shucking insane?!"

Thomas winced and at the exclamation and sighed as he watched Alby and Minho. Here we go...

Alby sighed and looked as if he was dealing with a winy child by the way he rubbed his forehead and seemed to compose himself. "Newt's not going to get any better holed up in this shucking hospital! It's...depressing in hospitals.", he explained.

Minho shook his head and crossed his arms. "So you want to take him out for a day in the city when he can still barely walk down the hall and back." Alby protested, "He won't have to walk much! We'll be driving to most places!" The same time Minho exclaimed, "You've lost your piece of klunk mind?!"

Thomas sighed as the two exploded into an argument. Thomas could barely understand what they were saying because they kept cutting each other off and yelling. The boys all got along for the most part but Minho, even though he didn't act like it, was protective of his patients and even Thomas had his doubts about Alby's idea. Although, a day out might be fun for Newt, the patient cold re-injure his leg and that would be pretty bad. (Thomas and Minho would be fired, no doubt about it, and Newt's recovery would take WAY longer.)

But even though Alby didn't seem like someone that could be trusted, (he came into the hospital for fighting and was expelled for the same reason. Doesn't exactly scream trust worthy..) Thomas watched Alby when he'd scooped Newt off the ground and carried him to his room. He'd held the other boy like glass but looked at him like he was gold. Even though Thomas had been a bit intimidated (sacred but don't tell anyone. Minho would never stop teasing him) by the muscular patient earlier, he couldn't help but trust him, especially when it came to Newt.

After thinking this over, Thomas had had enough of the argument. He walked closer to the arguing pair and yelled, "Slim it!"

Both of the other boys stared at him in shock and Thomas felt smug for a moment at being able to get them to stop. He took a deep breath and said calmly, "It's a good idea. But how are we going to get Newt out? We are just nurses Alby."

Minho face was frozen in a look of utter betrayal. He exclaimed, "What the shuck Thomas?!" and stormed towards the door. Thomas shrugged and got an idea. "Minho wait!" Minho paused and glared back at Thomas. "Slim it traitor!"

Thomas smiled and did his best to look nonchalant. "Okay whatever you want... But it will be the greatest hospital jail break that's ever happened here. I just thought we could use your help and all. I mean you have been running these halls for years. I guess Alby and I will just have to make hospital history without you."

Alby smirked as he realized what Thomas was doing and

Minho's eyes narrowed. "I know what you're doing.", he stated.

"Is it working?"

"Shuck yes!"

They all sat crowded in Newt's room. Newt wasn't quite sure how they managed it but all three of the other young men had found a way to cram themselves in to sit on his small hospital bed.

Minho had sprinted into the room with a huge smile on his face and jumped onto the bed next to Newt causing the patient to jump and then exclaim, "What the shuck you bloody ninja!"

Alby had calmly sat across from Newt leaving Thomas to awkwardly sit half on the side of the bed with his arms filled with maps and pens.

Needless to say Newt was confused.

Thomas laid the maps over their legs and handed one of the pens to Minho.

"Um what's going on?", Newt asked as he peered at the map. "Is that the hospital."

Everyone else nodded. "We're busting you out for a day.", Alby explained and Minho added, "And making hospital history!" Thomas sighed. "If we don't get caught that is." Minho glared.

"You don't get to be pessimistic, Mr. Grumpy. You betrayed me for this idea. No one gets to be negative about this but me if I so please."

Newt raised an eyebrow. "I think I have negativity rights as well. Isn't this illegal? I though a legal guardian has to check me out before I can leave. I don't want any of you shanks to get arrested."

"No, you do not get negativity rights ya shank. This is for your well being.", Minho said smiling as if that just won the whole debate over the idea and who can be pessimistic about it.

"You going to jail is for my welling being?"

"Of course not!", Minho exclaimed with fake hurt. "I though we were friends!"

Alby rolled his eyes and simply stated, "You're not getting any better here Newt. Some fun will do ya good."

Thomas nodded in agreement. Newt sighed and looked at each of them before leaning forward to look at the map.

"If you get arrested it's your own bloody fault."

Part one: Knock out excuse

Things went smoothly for about the first ten minutes of the plan. Newt was trying to metal steal his nerves when Doctor Clint came into check on him in the morning like he always did. Newt smiled politely like he always did and exchanged a polite greeting with the man as he plotted to deceive him. Newt mentally sighed as his conscious screamed at him that this was stupid and a shuck move to pull on the nice hospital staff.

Yet he stuck to the plan. He said that his leg was bothering him and that he just wanted to take a day to read and be alone. Just as Minho had predicted Clint asked him if he wanted more pain medications. Newt nodded not trusting himself to lie well any longer.

Clint upped the dosage and Newt could feel the liquid pouring down his wrist instead of into his veins from the needle Thomas had carefully pulled out from under his skin. Newt felt equal parts proud and guilty of his spectacular acting job when he let his eyes drift shut and let out a relieved sigh.

The doctors would expect him to be sleeping off the meds for most of the day.

Part one: Success

Part two: wheal chair race distraction

"No." Well shuck.

Minho sighed and walked out from where he'd been watching Thomas try to charm Teresa into letting the kids have a wheelchair race down the halls. Apparently charm wasn't Thomas' thing. Minho would've been laughing his ass off if not for the fact Thomas' inability to flirt well had ruined their plan.

Of course the shank had tried to lean on the desk casually and tripped because he was only looking at Teresa and ended up missing the desk entirely.

Of course he'd blushed like a middle schooler was his first crush.

Of course Teresa had laughed lightly and shut his idea down. Then, narrowed her eyes in realization and said, "This one of Minho's plans isn't it?"

Double shuck.

Oh Thomas...

Minho would really have to give him some pointers in the future.

Thomas was currently looking lost and Minho had to put a stop to his friends suffering to remain without a guilt conscious. He sighed and stepped into view from behind the bend of the corner. "Hey Teresa. I see you've seen right through Thomas here no surprise though, so no more lies."

Teresa crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow. "That's no possible from you Minho."

Minho put a hand to his heart. "That's not very nice. I am actually helping these shucks! I hated this idea at the start but ye know, Newt deserves for us to at least try." He shrugged. "You're pretty heartless to ruin our plan to help out our poor jumper. Shame on you."

Teresa bit her lip and Thomas gave Minho a disapproving frown. "This is about Newt?", Teresa asked. She remembered the kind boy fondly. The kids get so few visitors and he made Clara smile and laugh. She sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Well shuck!" She swore causing Minho to smirk and Thomas to stare at her in surprise.

Minho knew she'd help now. He didn't think a person could ever be so heartless to not help Newt. Minho wasn't one for outward gestures of affection so it may not seem like it, but Newt was starting to feel like a little brother to him. He'd be damned if he couldn't make this plan happen. Teresa was a good person and only the cruelest monster could ever so no to helping someone like Newt. He'd had her the second he'd uttered the patients name.

"I could loose my job for this."

Minho laughed lightly and opened his mouth but Thomas cut him off. "You won't we'll explain it's our fault. Besides, you want to help us anyway."

Teresa sighed and ran her fingers through her hair. "Sometimes I hate you Tom.", she said with no real heat. Minho beamed and spun to face the children. "Everybody up this is going to be one of the best days of you're lives!"

Part three: the actual escape

Alby had never really was good with kids. It wasn't that he didn't like them themselves. He just never knew how to act around them. Children were so new to the world like fresh snow, their innocence was beautiful and too short lived. He just never knew what was right to say. To be honest their quick acceptance unnerved him when usually people judged him with just one look.

They took in his muscles, old clothes that marked him as poor, the color of his skin, maybe even heard about his fights and that was that. They walked faster when passing him and then they were gone. Alby just wasn't used to being approached without judgment and it threw him off. It shook his well constructed wall. Children had previously been the only ones like that until he went to the hospital.

Newt was like a child in his immediate acceptance. It made Alby feel an unfamiliar warmth and he didn't give a single shuck about how cheesy that sounded. He wondered if he'd be better around Newt for long periods of time then he was around children. He really shucking hoped so...

When the sound of children's high pitched happy shrieks and laugher arrived Alby smiled. He didn't stop Newt from standing and peaking out from behind the corner even though they were supposed to be running down the halls already.

Alby walked over to peak out at the wheelchair race as well and he laughed lightly watching. Newt was the first to tear his gaze away and he said, "We have to get going before we get caught." Alby nodded and watched closely as Next limped back over to his wheelchair, making sure he wouldn't fall.

Newt rolled his eyes once he was seated. "I'm not going to shatter Alby. Stop looking at me like that."

Shuck! Was his concern that obvious? He really hoped not.

Alby just nodded and grabbed the handles of the wheelchair. Newt twisted to look at him and smiled weakly. "Thanks for this and um.. a few days ago. You know when my bloody leg gave out on me"

There was that pleasant warmth again like a cozy fire was lit inside him. "Don't mention it ya shank. Let's just get out of this shucking hospital."

"Good that."

Alby took off down the halls. He kept running and and only slowed to a walk when they were outside the hospital. He heard Newt sigh in relief and smiled lightly. "So what do you want to do Newt?"

Newt twisted around to look at him. He looked deep and thought and Alby felt his smile stretch a bit wider. Newt smiled back and said, "I think ice cream sounds amazing. I'm sick of bloody hospital food."

Alby nodded in agreement. "It really is shucking awful. Ice cream sounds like heaven."

He pushed Newt to the parking lot and smiled proudly at his motorcycle that Minho had retrieved for them earlier that day. It looked just as badass as the day he bought it. It was black with red lines scattered over it in some strange pattern like the worlds most confusing maze.

He let go of the wheelchair handles and walked forward to stand next to Newt. "That's our ride." Alby had never loved his motorcycle so much as he did in that moment. Newt stared at it in shocked disbelief before excitement took over his expression and lit up his eyes. The other patient reached up and grabbed Alby's hand to pull himself out of the chair. He stumbled at first and Alby felt his heart pick up when he caught Newt. "Careful."

Newt nodded in agreement looking at the other boy's arms around his waist with confusion. "Yeah..." Alby didn't allow either of them time to dwell on the unexpected embrace. He scooped Newt of the ground and laughed lightly when Newt yelped in surprised and then complained about not needing to be carried as he walked the short distance to his motorcycle.

Newt had never been on a motorcycle before. He had been missing out because it was bloody awesome. His laughter was stolen away by the wind. For the first time in what seemed like years Newt was really and truly alive. He heart pounded against his ribs and he tightened his arms around Alby as he straightened to look over his driver's shoulder. he had absolutely no idea where they were or where they were going and maybe that should've scared him but for some reason Newt trusted his new... friend?

Yes friend. It was nice to have friends. It was something he'd missed.

Adrenalin surged through him and he wanted to stand and feel the wind whip past him. He looked down at the pavement the rushed by under his feet. They were going so fast that it seemed like a sheet of grey paper. He could've go and he thought about the way he'd die with an adrenalin induced smile but then he tore his gaze away. He for the first time in what seemed like a life time Newt just wanted to enjoy being alive.

He wanted to feel the wind playing with his hair.

He wanted to see the trees whip past in a stream of green.

He wanted to feel his own heart beat and the sense that he was exploding from the inside but in good way. Like there was a build up of light inside him that would burst free at any moment.

He wanted to cling to Alby who was quite literally his life line at the moment, the only thing stopping him from falling.

He didn't want to let go.


End file.
